Tuesday, September 24, 2013


The customary lunch was served in a small plate, I was grateful for the meal knowing well that I couldn’t expect same on the streets. As soon as the plate was placed before me, one of the patients sitting beside me suddenly lurched for my plate and grabbed it with both hands, tipping her head back, she drank up my egusi soup. I nearly ran mad as I screamed, ‘Ahhhhh’ with my hands on my head. I jumped on the patient and wrestled her to the ground. By the time I was through, the nurses had arrived and grabbed me, binding me with chains while I watched the woman I had just beaten bleed in unconsciousness.
“She don kill am.” Shouted one of the nurses as they dragged me out of the refectory and locked me up in closed quarters.
I screamed loud and beat my hands on the wall till it grew numb, finally I crouched down and dozed off. I was stirred awake an hour later by rough hands which dragged me to an unfamiliar office. I was tossed to the ground like a bag of grass and left there still bound in chains. The door opened moments later and a woman entered the office, she didn’t seem to mind that I was there, she just dialed a number on her phone and listened to it ring, when the receiver picked, she spoke quietly.

“Come here, now.”
I looked up to see if she was addressing me but to my relief she wasn’t, minutes later, one of the nurses came in and greeted the woman, looking solemnly on the floor and shuffling her feet as though scared to face the woman.
“Who is this specimen?” The woman asked.
“Dr. Eliz it’s the lady that almost killed patient Joy, the noisy…” She started but was cut short.
“Is this my case? Is she supposed to be under my watch?”
“No ma…it’s actually Dr.Gerald’s case but the director says he doesn’t seem to be making progress with her case.
“It’s written here that she is due to be released in one week.” Dr Eliz snapped.
“Yes she was…that was until she almost killed Joy the noisy…”
“I will not take this anymore, no one has the right to add more work to my pile…”
“But the director ma…”
“Leave my office at once.” The Doctor ordered.
I watched the nurse scramble out of the room and I watched the doctor, waiting to see if she’d do something horrible to me. From the look of things, she was going to and I would be unable to stop her.
“Madam dokitor…abeg make I talk wetin happen.” I said feeling the pain at the sides of my mouth for the first time.
The woman didn’t reply, she opened her laptop and begun typing rapidly.
“See…madam, I no know wetin carry me come hia ooo…na my madam…if I catch dat woman I swear…I go kill am.” I said before realizing that I had just contradicted myself. “I mean say…I go beat am…no…I go give am word.”
Still no reply.
I sniff back my tears and stare at the woman before me silently, suddenly, a knock is heard at the door and my doctor steps in, looking as dashing as ever. I spring to my feet but was held back by the chains bounding my feet.
“Dockitor! My dockitor!” I cry in a plea.
My doctor ignored me and faced the female doctor before him.
“What is the meaning of this Dr. Gerald?” The woman asked in fury.
“I am very sorry about this and I promise it wouldn’t happen again.” Dr. George replied.
“Why would management send your patient to me knowing well that I have enough patients on my hands?”
“It was obviously done because I wasn’t around at the time she caused the scene.”
“Are you competent at all? I’ve read this lady’s file and for three weeks you’ve been on her case without results. From the tests conducted, she doesn’t seem to have any inherent mental problems, what is taking you so long to finding an absolute cure to whatever her ailment is?”
“Well…it’s a slow and steady process ma’am and I’m doing my best. The incident at the refectory has dragged me back to the draw board, I’ll re-strategize and take up her case again.”
The woman nodded and picking up her phone again, she placed a call, I watched as Doctor Gerald walked up to me and gently unbound my hands and legs.
“Let her be, Dr. Gerald, I’ll call the ward assistants to take her away.” The female doctor said.
“She’s not a criminal and she can walk on two feet, I’d rather we skip formalities.” Dr. Gerald said, his rich voice caressing my ears.
The female doctor nodded and we left her office, heading straight to Dr. Gerald’s office; immediately we walked in he cleared his throat and spoke.
“Senorita, this will be the first and last time you’d ever do such a thing again.” He warned.
“Sorry sir…I no know wetin catch me…na dat woman carry my food.” I begin to explain.
“We’ll start our sessions again and because of you, I’ll stay longer today. I’ll call the nurse to take you for a bathe…you stink. When last did you have a good bath?”
“E don tey since water touch my body…even when water touch am, soap no dey.” I complain.

Minutes later, a nurse leads me away to the bathroom where she scrubs me clean and after drying off, I change my wear to a neater one and walk back to the doctor’s office with the nurse in tow.
As soon as I stepped into the office, I knew something was wrong, the doctor glazed me over with red rimmed eyes and as I sat at my favourite seat, he wasn’t in a hurry to speak.
“Dockitor…you sure say you fine so?” I ask quietly with a hint of concern in my voice.
The doctor stares at me and looks away, apparently ashamed that I saw him in such condition. Immediately my mind tells me that I’m the reason behind his worry, maybe he could be sacked due to my display at the refectory. Falling to my kneels quickly, I plead his forgiveness.
“Docki…abeg no vex…na devil hand dey inside…” I start.
“Stand up Senorita, it’s not you…I’m having some issues at home but I’ll be fine.” He says as he walks up to me and helps me up to my feet.
We stand face to face, eye to eye and gaze to gaze, staring at each other as though for the first time. I feel a warm tingle down my spine and my breathe comes out in shallow spurts, I have never felt this way before. Even as we stood, I look into his eyes and see something I can’t describe, it’s deep and dark like the hooded umbrella and suddenly, not knowing what seize me, I kiss him.

He kisses me back with raw passion which blazes as though from a thick and deep forest. Raising my palms, I caress his face and moan at its softness. ‘Is this me? Senorita? The Lagos chick who was chased away from Janet’s place, sent to prison by her madam and Oga and finally landed in a ‘mental’ home?’ I wonder inwardly.  I can’t let this opportunity slip, I need to impress my doctor…perhaps show him some of my alluring skills and maybe he’ll have me for keeps.
We fall to the sofa and the rapid rip of my dress was heard as doctor Gerald proved that he wasn’t just good with medicine but fumbling as well. His hands trace the curves of my body and worked its way from my breasts to well…that side of me that I loved most. I was in pure ecstasy and the pump of adrenaline surged up to the base of my neck as I screamed in pleasure,

The water splashed on my body and I woke up in sweat, tears and in a drenched state, realization hit me hard as I stare at the nurses around me. Then I knew, it had all been a dream. Shaking my head in regret and moaning in disappointment, I wail;
"Which kain hand dey my life so? Abi na pesin curse me?"

Friday, September 6, 2013

Chains of Craze!

Image source:endoftheage.blogspot.com
I sat with hand tied above my head. 'Not again' I said too myself; 'Senorita..dis Lagos waka don dey get K-leg oo'
I hadn't been taken to a police station but to a place filled with mad people, I call them mad because the past two nights I have spent in this place almost drove me crazy as men and women screamed and laughed out loud even at the middle of the night. The workers at the institution acted crazy as well as most times they walked past our tightly closed rooms as though we didn't exist. I had been informed earlier that someone was to see me today; someone of great importance; a Tychiatrist...that was the name they called.
As I sat patiently on the bare floor and stared at the empty room, I cringed in fear; what if? Was my line of thought 'wetin dem wan do me for dis place? Abi na for craze cell I go dey?'
My thoughts were interrupted by the heavy metal bolt being unlocked from the outside of my room and once the door opened, I sprang to my feet, hoping that whoever came to see me, also  came to save me as well but the strict face of the man who walked into the room unnerved me.
"Oga abeg...I no do anything! Na dem carry me come hia..." i started but he cut me short by ordering two other men behind him to bring me out of the room. The two men were heavy manhandlers, they didn't care that I felt like crap instead they lifted me up and dragged me out of the room. I screamed loud and kicked my legs at the air, I was scared as to where we were headed. Two minutes later they dumped me in a small room which had no activity except the slowly whirling fan in the room.
"Oga please sir...helep me, na beg I dey so..." I cried.
The men walked out on me and shut the door behind them, I moved to a corner of the room and sitting down on one of the chairs, I cried again. This was the first time I really felt sad in the city of Lagos and desperately longed for home. At my village, I never went without food or shelter, even clothes though ragged, were available. 'Lagos is no man's land and once you have no family or friends, no one cares for you' I thought to myself as I pitied my present state. Shortly, the door opened and someone walked in, I looked up to stare into the eyes of a young man whose kind I have never before seen. Sniffing and wiping my tears with the back of my palms, I get up from the chair and look at him, with my tongue glued to my mouth. He was not just goodlooking but very dapper too, throughout my stay in the city of Lagos, I had never seen his kind on foot; they were mostly seen from the windows of vehicles.
"Hello Senorita...how are you?" He asked, with a lovely accent.
This was the first time someone pronounced my name with grace and composure, others made it sound like 'Sanurita!' but his was different.
"Sirr..." I replied, staring at him like a moron that I was.
Image source: blackdoctor.com

"Please sit, it's a pleasure meeting you. How are you feeling?" He asked.
I couldn't take it anymore, I started weeping loudly and falling on the floor like one who had been possessed by a demonic spirit. 'How could someone be this kind?' I thought as the tears rushed from my eyes and fell to my cheeks in torrents. He stood up and walked over to meet me, gently he helped me to my feet and retrieving his freshly scented handkerchief from his pocket, he handed it over to me. I blew my nose loudly and after which I shoved the handkerchief into my bra. I saw his eyes light up in surprise but he didn't say anything, rather, he held onto my hand and led me to the chair were we sat facing each other.
"My name is Dr. Gerald, I am a psychiatrist, I am here to make sure you get better." He said.
"Wetin? I no understand..."I started.
"Don't worry about that, I'll try to make you understand but first of all, I want to know all about you. I have studied your files, but I would like to see if you can communicate with me clearly."
"Oga...I no understand de big grammar you dey yarn. You fit talk pidgin?" I asked, clearly confused.
"No...I don't know how to speak pidgin but I could break down my words to enable easy comprehension."
"Complyvision? Dis one na gbege oo..." I murmur.
"This is going to be tough but I can assure you that, we would understand each other perfectly." He smiled.
I smiled back, like the idiot that I was; chiding myself for gushing over him after vowing to keep my hands off men for as long as I live.
"I'll get one of the nurses, she'll translate better." He said.
Taking his phone out of his pocket, I watch his gestures as he quickly dials the nurses number and speaks to her quickly. I am amazed at his mannerisms and at how neatly he looked; his nails were short and clean and his teeth were whiter than any I have ever seen in my life.
The nurse comes in moments later and spoils my 'AHA' moment as her chewing gum sounds smacks hard against my ears. The doctor ignores her lack of manners and goes ahead to give her instructions as to translating for his understanding and mine. We begun talking and I spilled in tears, my predicament and all that I have ever done, it was confession time and I felt keeping secrets unnecessary.
"So, from what you said, it was all your madam's plan from the beginning; she set you up." The doctor said as soon as the last part of my story was translated.
"Yes sir...na true talk." I said quietly.
The doctor scratches his head and drags in a deep breath, the nurse looks at both of us and laughs;
"Dr. Oyibo Gerald, please don't be fooled; this is how they all are...liars and desperately looking for ways to escape this facility. You should have seen what she did to her employer's friend, I hear the woman is presently in a state of coma."
"I'll appreciate it nurse, if you excuse us." Dr. Gerald said curtly.
"Hmmm...you are new in Nigeria ooo...I know you are a son of the soil but those years you spent practicing psychiatry in the Oyibo world cannot cure the madness of ninety percent of the patients here. I'd advise you to return to the place you were trained and practice there." The nurse continued while smoldering a laugh.
The glare from Dr. Gerald's eyes seemed to scare her away as she left the room.
"Talk true...na Oyibo you be?" I asked.
"No...I'm Nigerian in flesh and blood...heck, I'm not even light skinned." He said with a smile.
"But why you come Naija wen you dey jand before?" It was my turn to ask questions.
"I'm on a brief assignment here in Nigeria." He said then looking at the confusion on my face, he says "I am in Nigeria for short time and I will go back soon." He picked the words carefully, this time.
"Yeee....you wan leave me comot? You wan make I die for hia?" I begin to cry again.
"Shhh...I'll be here for the next two months and I'm sure you'll be out before then." He said.
I nodded in silence and sat quietly till I heard the knock at the door and the two men who brought me to the doctor's office, emerge again.
"Doctor Gerald, are you through with examination?" One of them asked.
The doctor nodded curtly and I turned to him in desperation and a quiet plea in my eyes, I could bear the torture of the room I had been confined to and I knew he was powerless to help me. As soon as the men dragged me away; I screamed at the top of my lungs;
"Dockitor Gerald...no be so you yarn oooo"